Artist life in lockdown
It’s been quite the intense time hasn’t it? We have already been through so much as a collective at a time when we have been forced to isolate from others. I don’t think that the eyes and thoughts of the world have ever been so singularly focused.
As a creative soul the thought of being at home does not pose a problem for me. Home is the place where I get to be me, to express myself through paint or pixels and generally feel the infinity of the universe in the magic of the moment.
But that doesn’t mean that I am better equipped than anyone else to deal with this particular curve ball. I felt the panic and the fear of the situation crash like a wave upon me and I struggled to breathe and think straight.
It was strange what became important to me and yet pretty obvious at the same time. I had been gifted with seeds for Christmas and so I got to work sowing them with my daughter. I had wanted to do lots of growing this year and so that is what I threw myself into. Digging, saving the ends of vegetables to grow and saving all the seeds from food I could.
Baking has also become a great comfort to me. It breaks the day into manageable chunks of activity with the reward of something tasty at the end of it. It also makes for a very happy household as there is a big joy in freshly baked cakes and bread! I think we have all been missing cafes and the treats that they hold and this is a small way of recreating that feeling.
It’s a happy distraction.
I jumped on board the 100 day project at the minute with the decision to put something positive and magical out into the world everyday. I’d like to create a piece of art every day, but realistically it’s quite a push and so I am giving myself the grace to follow this at my own pace. The intention of putting good vibes into the world is enough to keep my focused and also to feel of use.
I think that a lot of us have felt powerless at one time or another during this and that is a really disempowering feeling. We can all do something in our own little way whether it is a smile at a passerby or making a nice comment on social media - it all helps.
I found social media to be unbearable for a little while. It was so full of judgement, criticism and fear. I dipped in and out as I could, taking time to look after myself and my family. I did spend some days fighting tears, but l think that part of the difficulty of this is being forced to wrestle with your own shadow. There is nowhere to run to, everything circles back to you and your thoughts. If you can’t control them then you are lost, but then that has always been true.
I keep thinking about what it is that I am worried about - because actually I am okay in this moment. I think part of it is because we are all connected still. Our collective consciousness has been shaken and whether we are in the centre of the storm or lucky to be in safe spaces we cannot be unaffected. And so each day presents its own challenges and its own blessings, as it did before and as it will in the future.
Life in lockdown continues to be an adventure for me and I look to nature for inspiration and hope. The hedgerows are bursting with colour now and we have been blessed with many days of sunshine. I like to think that I put all these good vibes into my work and that my art helps to spread a little joy into the world. Sending you my love and well wishes. 💕😊✨